Is it Really Harry Potter?
by Henry Rettop
Summary: Harry gets haunted by things that don't belong in his book. This is just humor, not really horror
1. The Troubles BeginAcquaintances

~*~*~*Is it really Harry Potter?*~*~*~  
  
A/N: This is just a little thing I came up with, just tell me..IS IT REALLY HARRY?  
  
Well, here goes..  
  
Harry woke up in his Hogwarts dorm. He felt quite strange today. It didn't feel like a normal day. The door to the dormitory suddenly burst open. Regis stood there and shouted "WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE??!!?!!" Instantly, little computers sprung up in front of the boys' beds. Harry jumped out the window he suddenly landed on an umbrella. A weird man and lady marched around singing, "SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALADOCIOUS," along with some animated cartoons. Harry jumped off the umbrella and ran to Hagrid's hut. Maybe he would know what was going on. When he knocked, it wasn't Hagrid who opened the door, but..BARNEY!! A large, happy, purple-and- green, was it Tyrannosaurus Rex? Opened the door and said "Hi there kids!!" and he-or was it she? Opened his arms for a big hug. Harry ran in the other direction. He bumped into many weird red, purple, green and yellow babies in space costumes. "LaLa!" said one! "Tinky Winky!" said the purple one. "Dipsy!" shouted the green one in a muffled voice. "Po!" sighed the red one. Harry screamed and ran away. He managed to get into the castle when a happy, cheerful voice called his name. A purple and green foot stepped around the corner..DuhDunDunnnn..  
  
To be continued..THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME!!  
  
NONE OF THE CHARACTERS IN THIS BELONG TO ME!!! I SWEAR!!! Well, I hope not.REGIS BELONGS TO HIMSELF AND SO DOES THE GAME. MARY POPPINS-DISNEY, BARNEY-LYRICS STUDIOS, TELLITUBBIES-SOME TELEVISION STUDIOS!  
  
I swear it'll be continued this time! So, weird huh? 


	2. The Troubles WorsenMore Acquaintances

Is it really Harry Potter???  
  
~*~*~*~*Chapter Two*~*~*~*~  
  
Barney had just gotten around the corner when Harry pushed him over and ran towards Dumbledore's office. "Huhuhuhuuu!" chuckled the purple and green monster as he squirmed, trying to get back on his feet. must be a dragon of some sort thought Harry. Must report this to Dumbledore When he got the gargoyle guarding the stairs to the headmasters office, Harry tried to remember the password. was it 'nerds'? 'skittles'? "JELLYBEANS" Barney chuckled. "Jellybeans" mumbled Harry. The gargoyle came to life, gave him a kiss and hopped away. strange Harry ran up the spiral staircase to Dumbledores office. When he got there, at Dumbledore's desk sat none other but Dora the Explorer!! Harry didn't know this of course, he thought she was some species of monkey. "Hello!!" shouted Dora. "Meet Boots, my spider" she said sniffing up a spider who had fallen out her nose. Harry assumed the nose spider was Boots, but he was so wrong. out of a closet crept yet another acromantula! "Hello Boots!" said Dora, tickling the giant spider's pincers. Harry screamed as he ran downstairs. He was running through the hallway when he bumped into Snape. Or, what looked like Snape, except for the smile and the helicopter hat on his head. I'm not even mentioning the tee-shirt and jeans. "P-Professor Snape??" Harry stuttered. "Oh, Harry!! My dear boy, how are you doing. Now, run along to class. By the way, even though I'd love to see you in Potions Class today, you don't really have to come if you don't want to. 500 POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR!! Just for the heck of it. Well then, tata!" Snape replied and he hopped off.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED!!!!  
  
BARNEY BELONGS TO LYRICS STUDIOS, DORA THE EXPORER BELONGS TO SOME STUDIOS, SNAPE, THE ACROMANTULA, DUMBLEDORE, AND HARRY BELONG TO JK ROWLING!  
  
A/N Well howd' ya like it? The idea of Snape "hopping away" scares me. I'll get to the next chapter as soon as I can as long as you R/R!!! READ/REVIEW!!! 


	3. The Troubles Get ScarierEven More Acquai...

Is It Really Harry Potter  
  
~^~^~^Chapter Three^~^~^~  
  
Harry ran towards Mcgonagall's office, maybe she could set things right. When Harry walked in, things were different for sure. There was a tall, blonde, plasticy-looking girl putting makeup on at Mcgonagall's desk. "Hey there! I'm Barbie! Who are you?" she asked in a over-cheerful voice.  
  
"H-Harry" Harry stuttered.  
  
"Oh, what a cute name! Want to get a makeover!??!!!" Barbie said. Makeover? Harry thought it sounded dangerous. Harry screamed as he jumped out the window. He landed on the grounds near the lake. On a bench beside the lake sat..LUPIN!! PROFESSOR REMUS LUPIN!!! Or was it? Harry got closer to see someone who looked a lot like Lupin, except for the clothes. He was wearing neat, sharply creased khaki pants and a sweater over a long-sleeved shirt.  
  
"It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood," he sang. "A beautiful day for a beauty,"  
  
"P-Professor Lupin!!??" Harry exclaimed.  
  
"Would you be mine, won't you be mine" he continued singing. The man-it now appeared to Harry that it wasn't Lupin, abruptly stopped singing and said, "Hello, I'm Mister Rogers, who are you?"  
  
"P-Potter, Harry Potter" Harry said, for about the third time that day.  
  
"Would you like to go to the neighborhood of make-believe with me?" Mister Rogers asked. "To see Mayor Maggie, King Friday, Queen Sara and Prince Tuesday?" he went on. "Wait till I call trolley." Mister Rogers got up and jumped in the lake, pulling Harry with him..  
  
  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
HARRY, PROF. MCGONAGALL AND THE SETTINGS BELONG TO J.K. ROWLING! MISTER ROGERS BELONGS TO HIMSELF AND BARBIE BELONGS TO BARBIE COMPANIES!  
  
  
  
A/N: So whatd'ya think, one chapter left. Where do you think Harry'll go? Do you like my adding of Lupin in it. Oh, by the way the more reviews I get, the faster I'll write the next chapter so, READ, REVIEW! READ, REVIEW!!! 


	4. Was it all a dream?

Is It Really Harry Potter?  
  
~^~^~^Chapter 4^~^~^~  
  
  
  
Harry closed his eyes as he plunged in the ice-cold water. Harry opened his eyes and found himself with a mouthful of pillow in his four poster bed at Hogwarts. He sat for a minute-half expecting Regis to burst in. He slapped on some clothes and his robes and went downstairs, everything was normal. He looked on the grounds..there was Filch and Professor Sprout, talking about what to do about a rat problem. He went to Hagrids hut, and there was Hagrid, all the same. He walked back to the castle. On his way back, he met Malfoy, Pansy Parkinson, Crabbe, and Goyle walking by. They taunted him----a definitely normal day. He went to Dumbledore's office, just to check, on his way there, he bumped into Hagrid, they exchanged greetings and went on. As Harry neared Dumbledore's office, a spider scuttled out from under the gargoyle, which seemed to be puckering up, for just a minute. He heard Dumbledore whistling, all was well. Harry retraced his steps for his-now realized-dream, to Prof. Mcgonagall's office. There she sat..putting makeup on? No, she was just picking at something on her nose. He went out near the lake. There on a bench sat Remus Lupin himself!! "Lupin!!!" Harry shouted.  
  
"My, my, Harry." Lupin got up and started towards Harry. "Dumbledore said I could come back this year, under a different name of course. I am, for now, Prof. Rachel Luncya. Oh dear, I forgot to take the Polyjuce Potion, didn't I." He opened up a flask at his hip and drank from it. He horrifically turned into a young lady of about thirty years old. He-she had dark brown, straight hair to his-her shoulders. He-she had a skinny waist, a rather large chest, for a gentleman, and athletic legs. "Bet you can't recognize me as well this way." He-she said in a feminine voice.  
  
"P-Professor Lupin!!??" Harry asked, aghast at what had just happened.  
  
"It's Luncya, hun" Lupin/Luncya replied. Harry wished he hadn't gotten up this morning. Everything was normal except for this. He'd just have to get used to it. Harry just hoped Snape would...let's say---fancy her!!  
  
  
  
******THE END!!!!******  
  
  
  
EVERYONE IN THIS BELONGS TO JK ROWLING, EXCEPT FOR PROFESSOR LUNCYA!!!  
  
a/n: So! Good? Bad? Ugly? I tried to play on the philosophy that life is a dream and when you're dreaming it's real life. Do you like my idea about Lupin? I'm not really expecting that to happen---exactly. I combined the rumors of Lupin returning and the girl DADA teacher and that's what came out. Who knows, Lupin may come back using the Polyjuce potion to be someone else, and not be the DADA teacher. Fleur Delacour may come back as the DADA teacher using the Polyjuce potion to be Lupin!! Not that it would happen, but it could!!! Oh, and Cindy Regnarg has a fairly good fic about Harry Potter. She's workin' real hard, so go, give her a nice review. It's her first fic... 


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